Thank you for taking the time to visit; enjoy the posts...

BACK ONLINE. .

It's good to be back to my computer/ internet addition. My computer power supply went out and I took it back to be replaced. After a few days the part finally came in; a defective part that is, and then I had to wait a few more days. Finally, another defective part arrived - staying off their pissed customer they finally did what they should have done in the first place; take a part off the shelf in house to replace my in warranty part.

So... I', finally, finally back on line. Visiting a few other sites I've noticed the world's not fallen apart without me as much as my addition, maybe I should give up coffee.

OUR Wedding Anniversary, 23!

"A Date, which will live - in Infamy!"

April 17, 1982 - twenty three years ago my wife and I were married. The struggles to get to that point, and the many struggles since have been momentious; yet, not without great reward. I am frustrated with the desire of wanting to re-do so many of my failing moments in my life; but I have no regrets of saying "I do."

I find it very, very difficult at time to recall the time when she was not a part of my life. For it seems my life only began when she arrived, brightening every moment since. All my best adult achievements or mile stone experiences seem to have her as my point of inspiration, or motivation. Not day goes by that Alice Irene is not a constant reason for me wanting to be better than who I was the day before.

Happy Anniversary, dear, my one hope is - that I've at least made you as happy as you've made me. I love you more, than feble words could even begin to express. May we be granted another year; that I can strive to repay the joy you've broght me these many years.

IT'S A GIRL !!!

At 7:46 am Thursday morning, 14 April 2005; Savanna Alise Garza-Snow entered the world to forever change our lives! Eight pounds and seven oz., looking ever so much like her beaming father, James; Congradulations boy, you two did well! Jokingly I have been called 'grandpaw,' but now it's an admirable title I proudly wear with a smile. My daughter could do no wrong today; Savanna looked as precious and a crowing glory as much as Elizabeth was first in our eyes.

The Wheel turns, and with each new generation another stran is woven into the faberic of humainity. I feel as though my own small part is completed with the beautiful arrival my our delightful grand-daughter; grand beyond compare to the outpouring of love and welcome she has recieved on her "Birth-day." Seeing my own daughter born was exciting and wonderful; yet, seeing her child - a blessing. Is that not the "meaning" of life? To make our lives meaningful, to not just produce and die but live long enough to witness that new life create a new experience in its own likeness? Certainly!

May all those who read this know that our family is truely happy. Peace, love and comfort of a warm heart is not just in talking but in sharing; I've come full circle in life, and blessed to see it. So much of the world at large seems a dank and dark world through the eyes of the news media, but there is still true beauty in the simple things of life, like the birth of a new grandchild...

The Hardest Topic. . .

One of the subjects that seems to scatter any conversational group, is the topic of Death and dying. With passing of Pope John Paul II, and Terri Shraivo's case, both being so long in the news; by now many of us should be making our own Living Wills. Seriously, Wills and Obituaries are not for the dead, but for we, the living. The whole philosophical issuse is an industry, and matter of religion, all to its self. Leaving each one of us facing our own set time of departure . No matter if you're embalmed, or cremated everyone of will have to face the gory end some day.

Dreams. . .

The Spring winds blow
their cool morning breez
as coffee brews within
and sleepy heads awake
what kind of day will this be
oh a last night that
never should have been
tossing and turning
back aching mornful dreams
purple black staryness
of vivid night shades
mares of grusome details
unshakably real
whenever will the morning break
these dreams i have
turmoils so real
gripping with emotions
bleek with weeping cries
sheets sweat soaked
in morning's chill
yet her warm embrace
awakes with gentle
tones that all is once
again right in the world
and the coffee's brewing
the breakfast made
the day renewed. . .

THE NEPHILIM AGE. . .

. . . still under construction; any reviews thus far are welcomed, and a sign of further encouragement.

THE NEPHILIM AGE

"Memoirs of a Couch Potato"

After a few months of watching me peck away in my geeky Lab; my daughter "TemptationWillow," has begun her own Live Journal ( ahem.. sorry, can I use the name of another station here?) Shooo, what tha heck!


I find it neat - yeah, a little creepy too, I guess - to see the inner workings of her mind. Though I am thrilled that she's beginning to write, and finding an outlet for self expression; for herself.

I am very, very proud of my daughter. In some ways we are very much alike; yet, in the most awesome of ways we are vastly different. She has such an inner strength, and aura about her that, quiet frankly I never had at her age. Brass, bold, and so stongwilled; though proud, she almost scares me at times. Because her mother has been such an integral role model in her life, and even now they seem inseperable; I have all the upmost confidence that she will make a great mother. Hey, with her mother's intellengence, and my ahem - good looks and charm, Liz is bound to do well!

Blessings, is what she's been in both our lives...

Ending In Death...

"The End of the World is at Hand!" "The end of this wicked system of things is Near!" "Armageddon Cometh!" I - don't think so. . .

Since a small, extremely impressionable young age of six, I was bred and ingrained with these notions of 'doom and gloom' ever present in my life, like the threat of a bedtime boogy man. "You had better act right; or you wont make it through Armageddon into Paradise Earth!" Just as every good Catholic must have been admonished with the dammable curse of 'going to hell!'

I really can't tell you what I believe - BUT, I can sure as ... tell you what I don't Believe. "Beliving" is an expression of ones convictions, opionions. I no longer allow myself to firmly hold on to the doomfilled fear of Death; being some powerfully, griping skeletal hand reaching out to snatch away my existance. I use to worry constantly. "What if's" were an erosive cancer that ate away the very inner walls of my every thouhgt; I rejoyced in sharing my guilt with anyone who was near - even though they didn't care to listen, I'd weave my scared thoughts into their conversations, like some great moralist proverb they'd be honored to recieve.

Then I changed.

I realized, with an engulfing hallow feeling of loss, which welled up as inner laughter and spontanious outward giggles, and weird grins that - "ya know, I'm not the only crazy here; others are just as confused and messed up as I am, LOL {Laughing Out Loud}. What thu F- was I thinking, AnyWho?"
Not that all the morality right and wrongs were hogwash, mind you, but that all the trapings thereof were just a way of lock stepping individuals into the 'masses.' Surely "the truth", "reality", "real meaning in life" was not wraped up in making others feel bad, opperesed with gloomed filled guilt of someone elses precieved 'sins'.

Just as no one can say they "know how you feel" - no one can say "belive what I do;" for it is ultimatly between the Believer and the Creator. As an artist, sight would be the most horrable gift I could ever lose; I would gladly acept blindness - than blind faith.

The Pope Dies. . .

I am by no means Catholic; however, that does not mean my heart does not go out for his loss. I admired the Pope for his consistancy. Amid such drastic changes in the world which we live; to be such a staunch ultra conservitive and remain firm to so many "anti-s" in a world that's become so "pro" anything, well, that's amazing courage.

He praised peace, and was a champion for the poor. He was even against many of the staunchly moralistic spoutings of our present President W. I remember 1978 when he became John Paul II, and I'll remember where I was when I heard his died; and I'll remember the many changes I've gone through and remember a man who stood his ground. Wonder how much ground we've given up, where he contiuned to remain firm?

Blessings to such an example of moral consistancy!

Gerrrrr. . .

I've been working on some more pictures from my story and others; Geerrrrr - the "Hello" Bloger software isn't working for me sooo I'm not able to upload any graphics, til I figure that out.

I'm such a visual person. Even in conversation whenever someone says something I have this nack of "seeing" what they're saying - werid. Funny thing is when someone get graphic - I see it and turn red, LOL.

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