INSPECTION

Once a year the variouse State Agencies come together to converge with a vengence, it seems, on the campus' of the State Schools. This July will make eight years that I have been with the State; April is here and so are the Survey teams Inspecting, and the overwhelming stress levels shooting through the roof. Walking on razor blades and egg shells, while holding your breath, with that pretend frozen smile. Over acting every exacting detail, to preform in front of a clip board toting stone face jotting ever wrong thing down. Like Smokey the Bear's "Only You can prevent forest fires" - you are made to feel that passing the Inspection of the State Schools is totally dependant on you; while Pink Floyd's Teachers leave those kids alone, plays in your head as taunting, downward brows glare at you.

I know we'll pass. I know life will go on. It's just the time of the year, at work that everyone dreads most; the headachs of dealing with the Pro Staff running around like chickens with their heads cut off. Pretending it's just another day, as they reem you out about some minuet stupidity that has nothing to do with you, but something they themselves should have taken care of weeks before.

Come next week - same 'ol same, till Inspection next year...

NAME CHANGE

Nephilim Forbidden is the working title of my novel; that's been in progress, since - like forever. My, self chosen Pagan name of Falconmyst ("Soaring through the fog of life") seems more appropriate for such an eclectic Blog as this, and hopefully I can focus more on writing again.

Married and Moving on...

My daughter, Elizabeth got married this past Saturday, March 25, (pictures forthcoming). We held the small humble ceremony in our townhome. Comeing down the stairs, hand-in-hand with her made me feel so proud. When the minister asked, "Who gives the woman away?" I almost froze - Woman? Has she really become a woman? Like, when did this happen? I mean, just yesterday she was my baby - "Her mother and I do." Then as I gave her hand to my, her, - James, I said, "No take backs!" Everyone laughed at my nervous humor, but I didn't want to give "my baby" away. But she's a Woman now; The Wheel has turned and it's now my role to play Grandfather, the father-in-law, and grow grey gracefully. Wow... where has all the time gone?

I love Elizabeth so very much, and it tearfully makes me proud at how much she truely does love James; she's matured SO much with the birth of Savannah. And now, now they've moved away. Oh, still in the same area; from three miles, to nine miles away. But - the cord is so difficut to let go and her love in her own way. The "empty nest" never had such a punch with meaning as it does now. I thought it was my wife, Alice who be the emotional one - but I guess it's not really hit either one of us yet that the Wheel of Time really does cause one to view the world differently with age. Not that forty-three is ancient mind you; just, never saw myself at forty-three wondering how if came so fast...

Will Trek for Food

WOW! Ya know, some people will go to ANY lengths to be a Trekker! Sad - even worse than Tehuti with his sign, are those folks striving to revive The Original Series; or the guy who went bankrupt!

Geesh! Some people need to get a life. Man, I'm glad no one knows I'm a Lord of the Rings, and Babylon 5 - kind of guy...

Being a big Star Trek fan; since a kid, I've always wanted a StarFleet Computer. I came across a freeware program: HOLONOTES, that enable you to create files: address directories, inventory your books, phone book - whatever you want.

Another one lets you re-program your computer into the LCARS Starfleet format; if you're a little more savy with codes.

MY FORBIDDEN STORY

Still plugging away at my novel, a little here and there. Reformating the links and adding texture to the story; updating the online version a little at a time as well. . .

Full Circle

She's all grown up. This coming Saturday my twenty three year old baby girl will be getting married.
Wow.
Weirdly amazing, somehow.

It really does seem very difficult to imagine; only - wow, not too long along, I was getting married to my pregnant girlfriend, two months later I was holding our baby in my arms.

And now-

Now, I'm a grandfather holding my baby's baby; getting ready for a wedding...

I have never really had any ill feelings toward Elizabeth; I think its just that we're "too much alike," and how I imbued her with a certain brashness to be accepted-most of all to herself. Too hard? I have always been afraid. Afraid of the resopncibility, of being a "Dad",(Wow, the pedestal image of my own). But now looking back on it all I guess I did- I guess WE did alright.
Yeah. Elizabeth is pertty special. Atractive, smart, witty. I'm very proud of our daughter; the wheel truns us along toward another chapter in the story of our lives.

I remember when, it was now...

BEEN - Still, coughingly sick. . .

I have these coughing fits lately that rasp of deep seeded conjestion; been getting over being sick for eight days now. Sever left ear infection; that's thrown off my equalibrium, and had nearly lost my voice from bouts of coughing. Phlym, yuk, and blahs - all of which I am more than tired and ehausted from. NighQuill, pills, bottles, remidies; this thing's just having to run it's course - and it anit over yet.

I feel... well, just - bad.

Don't fell like doing much. Nothing seems to be interesting; other than getting rid of the head conjestion so I can breath. Yeah, nothing seems to matter when ya can't breath. Tried all last Saturday, during my 16 hours at work, to get off and be sent home; only to be given one frustrating excuse after another about the "coverage" shortage. So I called in on Sunday. Went to work on Tuesday afternoon; got sent home for being sick. Yesterday (still sick mind you) I got "writen up" at work for not having a Dr.'s excuse for last weekend! Great! Not only do I feel like the bottom of a tired shose but get reemed out for missing time at work; I have 237 hours of sick leave but can't take it - go figure? F- State!

grrrr sigh.... I feel - bad.

maybe i'll erase this crappy post later...

STAR TREK Revived!

Star Trek: NEW VOYAGES! Soars high in cyberspace. A fastly growing new subculture. I for one am excited to see The Enterprise complete her voyage; though new faces, they're still old friends.

Retro TRIP

This past week I went to visit my Dad. Even though I've lived in various places I still refer to Brownwood as my childhood stompping grounds. The 'ol homestead's been sold, reworked and ready for another resale; time marches on.

An old 1950s railroad car has been redone into a resturant - that actually serves rather good sandwiches. Across town a new Train Museum is underconstruction, that will be neat to revisit.
Though many things seem the same there are changes over taking the forest of Deadwood. Goggin Park, where we were married, is now undergoing a face lift; with all its playground equiptment removed. Several new Howard Payne University buildings have gone up. An underpass' overpass has been deconstructed. Various neighborhoods across town have fallen to neglect and disrepair, which is sad to see. Seeing my Dad again was nice. Because I work the weekends everyone else was at work, which freed up a lot of time to revisit the past. It was great visiting Tehuti, and Victoria Rose; who are both some of the neatest folks you could ever meet. Then, of course there was HOWARD.